GRADUATING FROM WEAKNESS AND FAULT FINDING TO STRENGTHENING TEAM PLAY

They Are Simply Focussed On Looking for Faults Instead of Building Strengths, But Everyone Can Improve

Introduction
In every office, school, family, firm, establishment and community, you will find two kinds of people. The first kind looks for what is wrong with others. The second kind looks for how to make others better. This second kind does not see people the way they are, but the way they should be. There may be a third, the siddon look, I don’t care group. Unfortunately, many people spend too much time doing the first. They are always searching for faults and weaknesses in other people, instead of working on their own strengths and encouraging others to become better.

This attitude destroys relationships, kills teamwork and makes life heavier for everyone. The truth is, no one is so strong as to carry all their burden alone, we all need one another. Life was designed for us to support each other, just like in a football game. This is exemplified vividly in football when one passes to another and in teamwork of one passing to another, they score and celebrate together.

The Problem: Fault-Finders Instead of Builders
People that are always looking for faults have trained their eyes and mind to see only what is wrong. If a colleague makes one mistake in a project, they forget the ten things the person did well. If a student scores 70 but fails one subject, they focus only on the failure. If a friend is going through a hard time, instead of helping, they gossip and point fingers sarcastically in scornful mockery.

This habit, perhaps, comes from insecurity. When one feels weak, one tries to feel better by making others look bad. We say things like, “Did you see how she talked?”, “He can’t do anything right,” “She is always late.” “Over sabi” etc. We become critics, instead of helpers.

The problem is that fault-finding does not solve anything. It breaks confidence and also breaks people emotionally. It makes people hide their mistakes instead of learning from them. It creates fear in offices and schools. It keeps people from trying even the things they can do, so confidence, creativity and innovation go down.

A child that is constantly criticized will stop trying. A worker that is constantly shamed will stop giving ideas. A friend that is always judged will stop being open, in fact, will refuse to show up where people are gathered, especially where those “judges” are.

The Better Way: Work on Strengths and Encourage Others
Instead of looking for weaknesses, one should look for strengths more and correct the errors in love. Every person has something good. One person may be good at speaking, another at planning, another at encouraging, another at solving problems. If all these are brought together, then a very strong and formidable team is formed. This is what you have in a football team; strikers, attackers, defenders etc.

When you focus on strengths, you grow faster. A teacher that notices that a student is good at drawing can encourage that talent instead of only punishing poor grades in Mathematics. A manager that sees that a staff member is good with customers can put that person on the front desk instead of complaining about his poor report writing.

Encouragement is powerful. A simple “You did well on this” or “I believe you can do better next time” can turn a person’s life around especially when done accompanied with a handshake, tap or even a warm embrace. When we help people work on their weaknesses without insulting or demeaning them, they become confident and loyal. That is leadership at its best.

We Need One Another: The Lesson From Football and Teamwork
No one is so strong as to carry all their burden alone, we all need one another. No one ever succeeded alone. No one never ever asked for help. You have what I don’t have and I have what you don’t have and it is so all across all humans. Life is not an individual race. It is a team game.

This is exemplified vividly in football. In football, no player scores alone. The defender passes to the midfielder. The midfielder passes to the winger. The winger crosses to the striker. The striker scores. After the goal, they all run together to celebrate because it was all a team work. No one says, “I did it alone.” They know that the goal came because someone passed the ball.

If the midfielder had spent the whole time in the game shouting, “The defender is slow! The striker always misses!”, or “you are dribbling too much”, would they win? Not at all. The team would lose because energy was wasted on blame game instead of passing to another. Passing to another enables the player to ‘rest and recoup energy’ before getting the ball from another passing.

The same is true in life. In a family, when one person is weak financially, another may be strong emotionally. In a school, when one student is weak in English, another may be strong and can help him. In an office, when one person is down, another lifts him up. That is how goals are scored in life — by passing, not by pointing fingers. If this were applied in politics, everyone, most certainly, would get something, unfortunately, it is about control, amassing more and more than they can ever use. Some names come to mind readily, do some also come to your mind? You may DM.

How to mitigate or Even End Being a Fault-Finder and Become a Team Player

1. Check yourself first: Before you criticize, ask, “What am I doing well? What do I need to improve on?” Work on your own weaknesses, especially that “log” in your eyes.

2. Look for the good: Train your eyes to see one strength in every person which you can use to fire up or fuel the energy absent in weakness before you mention that weakness. You lose nothing, but gain something because EVERYONE REAPS WHAT THEY SOW.

3. Be a passer, not a shouter or critic: Like in football, pass the ball. Give help, give ideas, give support, give room, give a hand. If your friend is struggling, teach him instead of laughing at him. One Philosopher wrote a song, “o nwo anno mbo leeee abmo a yi aba ozhne” literally translates to “don’t laugh at your brother, yours is on the way coming”.

4. Celebrate together: When someone succeeds because of your help, rejoice with them, instead of going to town and all media houses, print and electronic, announcing how, you are the one that fed him from infancy, as a matter fact, from inside the womb. It amounts to pride, and pride goes before destruction. Team success is by far, not even comparable, better than personal pride.

5. Remember our shared humanity: We all make mistakes. Today it is him, me or her, tomorrow it may be you. Be kind because you may need help tomorrow from this same person you demean today. Of course, the world is replete with such stories.

Conclusion
A society of fault-finders will always be a society of failures. But a society of encouragers will always grow and develop.

We were not created to live alone or to tear each other down. No one is so strong as to carry all their burden alone, we all need one another. Our strength is in our unity and togetherness.

Let us learn from football and from teamwork. Instead of looking for faults, let us look for ways to pass the ball. Let us use our strengths to cover other people’s weaknesses. Let us encourage, support, and lift each other up.

When we do that, we will not only score goals in life, we will celebrate together. And that is what makes life beautiful and the world a better place to live in.

I am Dr Frank Peter Ombugadu still on at least 3 People Every Day